A proud moment for the Worldwide Leader

In another moment of fine journalism for ESPN and Soccernet, they sent out Steve Davis to do player ratings for the MLS All Star Game.

That’s right he did player ratings for an All Star game.

That’s like trying to rate the attractiveness of women at Case Western University* – useless, pointless, and utterly futile.

* Feel free to “regionalize” this joke as required in the comments. I went to school in Ohio, where it was gospel that Case had no attractive girls. Here in DC, you can replace Case with Johns Hopkins.

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13 thoughts on “A proud moment for the Worldwide Leader

  1. Some of Davis’ ratings are real head scratchers. How does Ljungberg only receive a 5, yet Conde, who gave it away every other possession, is “easily MLS’ best defender” with a 7? Bizarre.

  2. WHY ARE WE DISCUSSING PLAYER RATINGS FOR A COMPLETELY MEANINGLESS NEVER-SHOULD-BE-PLAYED-IN-THE-FIRST-PLACE EXHIBITION BETWEEN ONE TEAM IN PRESEASON AND ONE GROUP OF GUYS THROWN TOGETHER 48 HOURS EARLIER!?!?!?!!

    That slamming sound is the sound me slamming my head into my desk repeatedly.

  3. Do those two fairly cool and not-at-all douchebaggy articles on Page Two from yesterday mitigate any of that silliness?

  4. sorry, there’s no all-star game in europe. jesus, when will mls learn that they have to be EXACTLY like european soccer?

  5. Please, don’t accuse me of Europoseury.

    I just think over analyzing a game that is made up of a bunch of (not even the best) MLS players and a preseason Premier League team is not worth of a player-by-player breakdown.

  6. I’m just laughing because I wouldn’t have even bothered with the player ratings until I clicked on the link.

  7. Actually, you said:

    “NEVER-SHOULD-BE-PLAYED-IN-THE-FIRST-PLACE”.

    Shouldn’t be played is well beyond shouldn’t be rated and deserved the Eurosnob shot.

  8. Um, I think if you read this blog more often, you’d find out that Aaron is just about as opposite of a Eurosnob as one can be.

  9. Agreed.

    I’m almost exclusively a fan of the All Star game because it pisses off so many people who think they know better….it’s a meaningless bit of fun….

    Though I agree, “ranking” players who participated in a meaningless bit of fun is the ultimate in stupidity…

  10. Player ratings in any friendly strike me as pretty dubious, but under these circumstances truly meaningless. Really, though, I just wanted to post an old [INSERT SCHOOL HERE] joke in reply to the Case observation.

    “Harvard Law School, where Brains x Beauty = Constant.”

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